the corner office : Stupid stupid stupid

Stupid stupid stupid

A pet peeve of mine is the 'serving suggestion' label on all food packaging. I'm not sure if this is purely a South African lunacy or whether the whole planet is afflicted by this drivellous, misguided notion of "value-add". In case you don't know what I'm referring to, it's when food packaging which has a picture of the food in some happy "eat-me" pose, has a small label somewhere on the side of the picture saying "Serving Suggestion."

That would be great if great opulent feasts and tantalising displays were depicted on the tin, packet or box. Displays pushing us to ever greater and more appetising ways of serving our daily foodstuffs. Instead, it's the drollest, boringest, least-inspired photograph of the product, au naturel or close enough to that.

Never in my wildest dreams, and assuming I ate them, would I have thought I needed a 'suggestion' telling me to serve baked bloody beans in a bowl. What are the alternatives? On toothpicks on a platter? What kind of patronising marketroid thought we were too dumb to figure these things out for ourselves?

Anyway. That's a long-standing issue and these days I'm largely over it.

Today, though, I saw a new beauty. I popped into the local Woolworths to buy lunch and a few groceries, and noticed that the pork bangers I bought have a nice pink little heart-shaped label saying "Valentine's Breakfast Solution"

Woolworths is now selling a Valentine's Breakfast Solution.

That is just too wrong.

{2004.02.10 15:02}

Comments:

1. jonvon (2004.02.10 - 15:45) #

my favorite is the shampoo labels that say, "lather, rinse, repeat".

as if it isn't obvious they are just trying to sell more shampoo. or maybe there is a secret plot to get everyone's hair to fall out.

2. Tom Nichols (2004.02.10 - 19:09) #

ROFLMAO!!! That is great, man. However, beans in my house are normally served from a pot. From the pot, they get transfered to paper plates, or the mouth, if I'm "batching it" for a day. [grin]

So, the bowl suggestion is a slight bit fancier.

Great post- thanks for the laugh!

Tom

3. Ronwen (2004.02.10 - 20:18) #

Yes, and using utensils, such as a fork or spoon to eat said beans is also a great touch.

4. Colin (2004.02.10 - 20:22) #

Anything facilitating less dish washing is a good idea :) The local custom is to have 'em slopped across toast or bread. Ghah. I'm in a minority, but baked beans and I are Not One ;)

5. Ronwen (2004.02.10 - 21:08) #

Thank God for that. ;)

6. sandy (2004.02.12 - 18:49) #

Just one thing to add, for completeness. "Woolworths" in South Africa is "Marks and Spencer" to the rest of the world. Someone might know more about it than me, but it goes back to the day of apartheid and sanctions, just like every other global brand that wanted to make money in SA but didnt want to be seen to have a presence in said country.

7. Ben (2004.02.14 - 04:53) #

Actually, Woolworths is also in the good old UK (strike good, keep old); and if its there, I'd hazard an uneducated guess that there's Woolworths in Australia too.
The link with the apartheid and sanctions is new for me though ... interesting.

Whenever I wash my hair while I read the label on the bottle, which says "Rinse hair, lather, rinse after 30 seconds", I can't help but wonder obsessively if it will work if I rinse it out in 5 seconds or what will happen if I leave it in for a whole minute.
...This label is mostly on conditioners though.